You force your eyelid open with your hand, lean your head back and attempt to drop Visine into your naked, irritated eyeballs. Most of the Visine ends up in your hair, cheeks and mouth, and the ones that hit the target sting.
There’s got to be a better way.
Finally, there is.
With the help of my wife Shannon, I’ve invented the Eye-Whacker 2000. No more Visine dripping down all over your face.
The premise of the Eye-Whacker is quite simple. Just whack the dust, dirt or hair right out of your eyeball, as I’m demonstrating on my eager son Noah in the picture. (Nate lost the coin toss and had to take the picture.)
Don’t we all need someone else to help us remove things from our eyes? Who better than someone wearing the Eye-Whacker 2000? (The EW 1000 had design problems, which have been resolved with the EW 2000.) Since the pipe insulators are taped to the bandanna around my head, my hands are free. It’s genius.
I will admit, it’s better to be doing the Whacking, than being Whacked. But remember, it’s for their own good. And who better to Whack than me? I’m quite good at Whacking things out of people’s eyes.
I showed Eye-Whacker 2000 to my Sunday school class this morning before we looked at the Sermon on the Mount (chapter 7). After some initial hesitation, many volunteers eagerly got Whacked.
And people say Jesus didn’t have a sense of humor…